Ashley and Bethany on a semester break from senior year of college. Each is “on their phones,” as they say, with email, texts, apps, etc; while talking to each other.
ASHLEY: Oh My God. Horrifying.
ASHLEY: I just read something.
ASHLEY: If this is true it’s horrifying.
BETHANY: All right. But i doubt it.
ASHLEY: It’s horrifying. If true, hor-ri-fy-ing!
BETHANY: Well, what is it?
ASHLEY: Hey, how about this… Chemtrails.
BETHANY: Oh yeah, that’s not true.
ASHLEY: Seems like it is. I mean, chemtrails.
BETHANY: Yeah, I know, the government dumping chemicals out of the back of commercial airlines.
BETHANY: Whatever. Its a, what, a conspiracy theory.
ASHLEY: How do you know? I mean how would we would you ever know?
BETHANY: How do I know it’s a conspiracy theory?
BETHANY: Because it is.
ASHLEY: But that’s just it, that’s just it, the cover-up, the cover-up is part of the conspiracy.
BETHANY: The cover-up is not part of the conspiracy. The conspiracy is not real, there is no cover-up. There can’t be a cover-up of something that doesn’t really exist. Duh.
ASHLEY: What are you talking about? What are you even talking about? That’s what a conspiracy is, a cover-up! There has to be a cover-up or there’s no conspiracy.
BETHANY: OK, OK, I agree with you on that. But there’s no cover-up. There’s no-cover up for something that’s not happening. That never happened.
ASHLEY: So if it happened, then there is a cover up?
ASHLEY: OK, you think that 9/11 just happened? Just happened, like it was just terrorism, and that the government wasn’t involved in 9/11 at all?
ASHLEY: You think Lee Harvey Oswald shot Kennedy?
BETHANY: Yes, like a million years ago.
ASHLEY: You think the people have actually been on the surface of the moon?
ASHLEY: Are you having sex with my father?
ASHLEY: I hacked into his email. (pause) Horrifying.