Monthly Archives: October 2015

Two Wifes (sic)

I have two wifes
So deal with that
Deal. With. It.
A secret life in Northern California
Or Utah
Or Nebraska, or Minneapolis, or Dover
Delaware Central Women’s Penitentiary
Doesn’t really matter, does it?

I have two wifes
Think I’m fucking crazy?
Think I’m fucking crazy?
I’ll show you
I’ll show you who’s fucking crazy

I’ve already told you
Or have I told you?
I’ve already told you a thousand times
I have two wifes, after all
It’s America, after all
Land of the free and whatnot

And I’m not lyin’
I’m not even lyin’ to no one
No. One.
Except my second wife
And, oh yeah, my first wife, too

Because, I have two wifes
And, I have a secret
A secret secret
A secret secret secret secret

They’re twins

Now that’s funny
Now that – for the love of all that’s holy – that’s just freakin’ hilarious